if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
