I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
