apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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