Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
Randomize
