his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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