So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize
