Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
someone owes me an orgasm
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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