so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
