Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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