3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
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