You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
they're like a gay fantastic four
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
be right there i have to get my cape
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
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