You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
