Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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