Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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