all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Randomize
