is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
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