he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
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