idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
Randomize
