Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
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