Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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