Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize
