Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Randomize
