His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
