dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
