Cold hands, warm shart.
It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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