she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Randomize
