If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize
