This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
