Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Randomize
