Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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