as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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