It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
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