Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
