Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Randomize
