somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Randomize
