she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
Randomize
