when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
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