How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
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