Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize