So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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