Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Randomize
