She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
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