I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
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