nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
