? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize