This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize
