no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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