"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Randomize
