Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
