didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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