Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
